[her lips thinned and she considered that for a moment. Jinx saying that wasn't ... no, it wasn't wrong. In a healthy relationship they should have been able to find happiness together for each other. They didn't always have to be 'in love' or anything really intense or super happy, but they should be able to find happiness. But...]
Maybe some part of your happiness is seeing people close to you happy. At the same time, it's important for you to be happy on your own terms, I think. It sounds like you're not really used to 'wanting' things for yourself. Or thinking that you deserve to have them.
And you do deserve to be able to be content. Maybe you aren't the sort that's super happy, but you can be content. right?
[ There's a slight nod on Chizuru's end, though it still seems like the girl is very much sunken in thought. ]
I mean.. Just spending my days like this, with you and my other friends.. Just being around each other.. That's enough for me. I guess you could say that makes me content.
[ Honestly, Chizuru would even call it happy, were it not for the fact that she's a little worried about whether it's a good thing or not that it makes her happy at this point.. All these conversations are so complicated.
Especially since - as Neo points out - Chizuru doesn't know how to want anything. She never really has before. ]
[Hmmm, well. She'd been the one to open this can of worms. today'd ended up a bit more weighty a talk, but at the same time? It probably needed to be. She had to think about this, because it was... honestly a very hard question for her. She'd never really been content except when Emerald had been in the dream and when Roman had been alive.
But her discontent was her problem, not Chizuru's.]
I think it should be you who decides what's enough for you. I don't think it's something that Jinx or I could ever actually tell you, really. We can tell you that you deserve to be happy, and that's fine.
But you get to decide what that is for you. And you get to decide when it's enough for what you want. And even when you're ready to ask for more.
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no subject
Maybe some part of your happiness is seeing people close to you happy.
At the same time, it's important for you to be happy on your own terms, I think.
It sounds like you're not really used to 'wanting' things for yourself.
Or thinking that you deserve to have them.
And you do deserve to be able to be content.
Maybe you aren't the sort that's super happy, but you can be content.
right?
no subject
I mean.. Just spending my days like this, with you and my other friends.. Just being around each other.. That's enough for me. I guess you could say that makes me content.
[ Honestly, Chizuru would even call it happy, were it not for the fact that she's a little worried about whether it's a good thing or not that it makes her happy at this point.. All these conversations are so complicated.
Especially since - as Neo points out - Chizuru doesn't know how to want anything. She never really has before. ]
But is that not enough..?
no subject
But her discontent was her problem, not Chizuru's.]
I think it should be you who decides what's enough for you.
I don't think it's something that Jinx or I could ever actually tell you, really.
We can tell you that you deserve to be happy, and that's fine.
But you get to decide what that is for you.
And you get to decide when it's enough for what you want.
And even when you're ready to ask for more.
This should be on your time. Not ours.