Sure, [ he agrees easily, and whether Robby can tell what's going on in Chizuru's mind or not--he holds out to her the berry he's picked. Look, Chizuru. A blackberry...!! ] You have these in Japan?
[ Maybe she's had them here, but it's fun to learn about your friends and sound like a clueless American, right. He's got gloves on (a good constant to have in Trench, so picking doesn't bother him. Truthfully, it's less about being food conscious to Robby as this is about having trade options in the future. And when he's got a bunch of friends who love to do kitchen shit, it's the perfect way of obscuring some money in the bank, right?
Robby's omen has seemingly finished with his back-dirt rubbing and is now watching the pair. It's a nice day, for once... ]
.. not that Chizuru is fully sure, mind you. It's not like she's spent a whole lot of time out in nature, but she does remember some trips with her father to gather herbs when she was much younger.. Not to mention that she's never seen fruit like this at any of the marketplaces back home.
So she's at least sure enough to shake her head without feeling like she's lying to him.
The girl still doesn't just grab the fruit from his hands - please, it's Chizuru - but she's staring at it intently all the same, before her gaze flutters up to Robby's face as she asks: ]
What does it taste like..? [ N-Not like she's curious for any special reason..!! H.. H-haha..!!
At least she does know the fruit is safe, since her little birdie Omen is still snoozing away on her shoulder, which he wouldn't be doing if there was actual danger surrounding this mystery berry. ]
[ Really, Chizu? At least the puzzled-but-humoured face Robby makes isn't judging (okay, maybe a little) when she asks the question...that would be very easy to answer if she just took the berry. But now he's having to think of how to describe a blackberry, which does get Robby to turn the small thing between his fingers. ]
Mostly sweet, sometimes sour? Not in a bad way, [ he adds, and--really, he can't describe it any better, so he motions the berry at her. ] Here, try it. Spit it out if you don't like it.
[ Ladies just do that, right. You can totally suggest a person do that. ]
[ There's absolutely no way Chizuru would spit out this berry after putting it into her mouth. Not even if it'd kill her. Death over being impolite, clearly.
It's why she's already determined to fully eat the blackberry the moment she does take it from Robby's hand with a grateful nod, slowly moving it towards her mouth. She absolutely can't spit it out! T-That's gross! And rude!
.. thankfully it's not really a decision she has to make in the first place though. Nothing about the fruit tastes bad once it's in her mouth, and Chizuru swallows it after a moment of thoughtful chewing. ]
It's good. [ A rather simple conclusion, but.. well, it's just true.
No wonder Robby couldn't resist the call. ]
They're small.. [ So you'd need a lot of them to have a full meal, she means, especially as she's turning to look at the ones that are still growing. ] But they'd be good to have around as snacks, right?
[ Congrats on surviving a blackberry, Chizuru. Robby watches without too much interest, considering it's just a blackberry--nothing exciting there. Either she likes it, or she doesn't.
And the results seem to indicate a pass, about as simple as is to be expected. It's as she goes on that Robby livens up, since oh, Chizuru. ]
Sure, but jam? I love blackberry jam. Mom used to buy it sometimes if we saw it. I wanna take these to Snow White and put on my best face to get a few jars made.
[ Robby does gesture to the small crate he's got at his feet, no bigger than a waste bin. Too small, not the right carrier? You have to use what you can find lying around, and Robby does not want to stick berries in a bag. He's already learned his lesson there once...!! ]
You can come with if you wanna learn something new in the kitchen. Hanging out in a kitchen with friends is fun.
[ Wink wink, since Chizuru's taught him a few meals. :) ]
Even though Chizuru may be a little too busy - mentally busy, that is - to really catch on to that last part. She's too busy thinking about jam, still a relatively new enough concept to her that she needs a moment to think to recall what it even is again, and then thinking about these berries being made.. into jam.. and what that'd taste like..
....
It's all being processed, even if it means that Chizuru may be quiet for a moment longer than necessarily intended as she stares at the berries, almost as if she's mesmerized.
But then she seems to snap herself out of it - enough to shoot Robby a faintly sheepish look before she ducks her head. ]
Well, I guess it's a little embarrassing for me, isn't it.. Being outdone by someone so much younger. [ Snow White is so young, Robby. Chizuru may look young for her age, sure, but she's a grandma in comparison!!
Not that she doesn't genuinely think Snow White is amazing, so of course she could make this mystical berry jam, but it's a little bit hard to not feel embarrassed when you make cooking out of your Main Things and then you can't make something a 14 year old can apparently make...
Welcome to the world of female pride, Robby. The variation that doesn't involve catfighting while kicking each other in the face, anyway. ]
I-- I guess the least I can do is make sure to pick as many of these for you as I can, to make up for not being able to help you turn them into jam..!
[ Imagine...imagine being embarrassed you don't know how to make jam. It's confusing, if not deeply so; but Robby still can't help the puzzled look--with a smile!--that he gives Chizuru's way at this confession of hers. She's embarrassed she doesn't know how to make something she's never had? ]
Come with me, [ is his very simple solution to this; a fondness to his voice like humour, baffled, but nevertheless. ] You wanna learn? She's been giving lessons since last year, and--I don't know how to make jam.
[ Look at him, gesturing at himself with both hands!! ]
You're not gonna be the odd one out. You can show her how to make something from your side of the world; she'll love it.
[ Never doubt Chizuru's ability to get embarrassed or flustered about anything. It's a talent, really.
Though it's a talent she can at least use while multi-tasking, since she's starting to help now to pluck some more of the berries, handing them over to Robby so he can put them with the rest. While listening to him, and while still seeming a touch flustered. Chizuru is a multi-talented girl, obviously. ]
I'll come. [ That's not her problem, at least. Like she's ever going to turn Robby down.
Besides, she'd want to help anyway. ]
But-- um, j-just so you know, it's different when you don't know how to make some food. [ Look at this. Chizuru trying to protest, but in her typical Chizuru-like way - where it sounds like she doesn't want to go too hard with it, out of worry about being rude, but still wants to.. gently try and say what she wants to say anyway..
If not just because it's Robby, and she trusts him enough to be a little more expressive than she may necessarily be around others. ]
You're a boy.
[ Welcome to earlier century gender standards, Robby.. ]
[ Robby's not dumb enough to not get the cultural difference here--hell, a standard level of expectations between girls and boys about this stuff. He'd like to say it doesn't matter, but the most he can say about that-- ]
My mom can make food, either. [ With a smile, and no judgment. Just, that's some insight on where people are in the future, Chizuru. He says this while working to grab berries, plucking a few and then turning to chuck them in. He wishes he had scissors (garden scissors?) to get through to some of the farther up ones, but eh. There's enough mess to get some jars of blackberry, right? ]
Show her that unagi recipe. With the sauce? [ Oh. ] I bet there's ways you pickle and she pickles that're different. She's from...I think Europe. Americans came from Europe to America, so there's more cross over with us.
[ And the fact they're both white, but he's mainly trying to signal the big difference between Japan and wherever Snow White's from. ]
[ Sorry if Chizuru gives you a really baffled look for a moment as she tries to process that fact. Not that she knows a whole lot about what mothers do, given that she grew up without one, but Chizuru does at least - obviously - know about societal expectations. The idea of someone having a mother, but said mother not making food for them..
.. yes, it's odd.. And it's not like Robby was all that good at cooking either when she first started teaching him, right? W-What did they eat..? Would that be rude to ask? It feels like it would be rude to ask.
Chizuru's mind is still churning on that one as she deposits more of the berries, and then starts on something that feels a little safer. ]
There were a few Europeans trading with Japan.. [ Chizuru may not be that great at keeping track of major movements in the country, but she did know this much, especially after her involvement with the Shinsengumi. ] But there wasn't much influence. People don't really like western influence where I come from..
[ It's a Big Thing, Robby. History is wild. ]
My father did study Dutch medicine though. It's why people came to him for things they couldn't see other doctors in Edo for..
[ She glances back at the vegetation in front of them right now. ]
But he never told me about these berries. [ Granted, they're not really medicinal, now are they. ]
[ Oh yeahhh, Robby thinks he knows something about that history and Japan trying to close off from the rest of the world. Too bad Japan had to find out how demanding Westerners are!! ]
Well, good thing I'm here to tell you now. [ How about that. Nevermind a dad who was seemingly not around for any good reason in the first place, and who Robby doesn't have many good thoughts about (but who also knows to keep that shit to himself!! shitty father solidarity!!). ]
Did you learn about Dutch medicine too like you did the other stuff? [ You know, other stuff. 'Other medicine'. ]
[ At least she seems to relax a little when Robby mentiosn it's a good thing he's here - because she agrees with that, and not just because he can tell her about the concept of western things. It makes her pause and stare at him, her expression shifting into a small, but very real smile.
It's enough of a reply that when she replies out loud, it's only to that next part, first nodding and then: ]
Some of it. But apparently he had also been working on things I never knew about.
[ There's a bit of an awkward tone even to just the way she says it, indicating that said 'things' might not be necessarily good.. ]
He was.. um.. [ Her berry picking momentarily slows down. ] He was experimenting.
[ A dad who's experimenting and runs off on his own daughter. At least this dad was doing something with his life? ]
This have something to do with why he left?
[ And all that shit around that other guy he was apparently involved with? Robby does note Chizuru's slowing, a look taken her way, but he'll keep picking between their conversation. God, what was that name of that one asshole from Chizuru's memory?
[ She thinks so, but it's not like she's had many opportunities to talk to her father at all since that time he disappeared - and every single piece of information she's gotten since then has only felt like it muddied the waters, including the one time she did get to talk to him.
But whereas that might mean she'd keep all speculation to herself with some people, she feels a little bit more comfortable with Robby. Maybe it's okay to talk about this when he's having trouble with his own dad too, when he might understand that innate instinct to defend them yet try to cope with their bad deeds at the same time. ]
I.. think so though. He was developing a certain kind of medicine in secret. [ Chizuru's hand lingers on a berry for a moment, but then puts it with the rest before she continues to speak. ] It could make people inhumanly strong.
[ Another thing she's not supposed to tell other people about. Not that she couldn't talk all the same with the Shinsengumi and their secrets not present in this place, but-- again, it's Robby. It's not like she's going to keep it from him. ]
[ A medicine that could make people inhumanly strong... weirdly, not the first time he's heard about such a thing. Just, using the word drug instead of medicine.
But it doesn't have to be like shimmer, does it, and Robby's trying to be thoughtful. Chizuru's world is sorta like his own, if in the past, but there is something that removes them: demons.
(Or maybe demons really do exist in his own world, and he just doesn't know like millions of others. Fuck, Peter's got a demon in him too, right?) ]
Did medicine like that exist? I mean...stuff that changes you. Makes you stronger, or--faster? Superhuman?
[ Magical, is what Robby wants to say, but it doesn't fit right, and he's frowning, unsure if he's making sense. ]
[ Chizuru nods. It may be a relatively new thing to her, just like the existence of demons, but she knows it's real. She's seen the medicine, after all. She's seen what it does to a person.
It's not good, though, hence why the girl doesn't exactly look enthusiastic about it as she nods. ]
It turns you into a demon. [ Her tone is so serious as she says it, yet lowered a little in volume. It's not even like there's anyone directly around them, but Chizuru seems to not want to say the d-word too loudly in public, not when it could be linked back to her. Sure, most people who heard about it here have been really good about it, but..
Habits die hard. ]
Or.. that was in the intent, anyway. It doesn't fully work like that.. Instead it changes humans into-- um, something inbetween. They call it a fury.
[ Chizuru speaks slowly, trying to divide the information into small little chunks. It never sounded like Robby's world had anything even remotely like this, after all, and the last thing she'd want to do is overwhelm her friend. ]
It means that you're stronger and faster than a normal human, but.. it also changes you into other ways. You can't walk under the sun very well anymore, and you-- you get a craving for blood. [ Yes.
Yes, she is describing vampires, despite not using that name for it. ]
Which, maybe there's a variant of vampires in Japan not called that, though the distinctions don't really matter. The symptoms still suck, and Robby wants to ask if people are actually taking it. But if Chizuru knows, then--? ]
The drug got out? [ ...it's really a drug at this point, right? It's not fixing you, like medicine. It's...changing you. Let's go with drug. Also, those berries? Are not currently getting picked because talking about vampires and berries don't mix.
He made it for the shogunate. [ The word flows out of Chizuru's mouth naturally, though as ever, she's pretty quick to catch onto concepts that may be natural to her, but not necessarily to Robby. So even if he might know, she still clarifies: ] They're the people in charge back home. The Shinsengumi work for them, to help keep the peace and protect the shogun.
[ She explains it a little slowly, but even though Robby may have stopped with the berry plucking for a moment, Chizuru does continue.
.. in fact there may be something a little extra to her motions, like she's using it to distract herself from focusing too hard on the current topic, since that'd just make her miserable. ]
That was.. the secret of the Shinsengumi. The shogunate ordered them to use it on their own men. Not on everyone, but-- um, on a small group. But it didn't work that well, and the people they used it on were very prone to losing their minds.. [ Her tone is obviously awkward.
Why wouldn't it be, when her father is the person who caused all of that? That knowledge has only made her thoughts about him even more complicated, even aside from all the demon stuff. ]
It's why I was actually staying with the Shinsengumi. I accidentally found out about their secret. I-- I ran into some of those men while they had escaped and were going wild by killing people on the street at night.. Some of the Shinsengumi captains saved me from them, but they couldn't let me go free, since I found out about the secret experiments.
[ And, you know, keeping her captive? Chizuru knows it was the kinder option, considering that killing her off right away sure was discussed. Extensively. Right in front of her.
But Chizuru knows better than to mention that part to Robby on top of it all. ]
[ robby would just want to talk to some guys if he knew, that's all. a chat, chizuru.
But Robby doesn't eventually resume the berry picking again, since--Robby can tell it's on purpose on Chizuru's end, and he doesn't want to make her feel any more awkward by his stopping, or that she should stop using it as something of a distraction. Though he's slower, no longer thinking about them or the jam. How can his mind be on any of that with everything that Chizuru's telling him now?
Like, shit. How do you deal with any of that? From what you're dad is doing, to the captive situation (that's a sure different scenario from what he was thinking, huh), to the drug... ]
Did they find out your dad was the guy who made the drug? [ Since Chizuru knows--and she didn't seem to know where her dad was to begin with. ] That's gotta give you protection.
[ You don't want to off the drug-maker's daughter. ]
(Wow, so spot on - almost as if Robby understands the way semi-shady people think a little too well!!) ]
It's what saved me. [ She admits it with a very soft tone. It's not pleasant to think back on, after all. Though her life with the Shinsengumi was good before she showed up here in Trench - very good, even - the first few months sure were really, really rough. ]
I helped them look for my father, since he mysteriously disappeared after giving them those potions. But along the way things got more dire, and..
[ .. her voice trails off. Chizuru's hands grow a little slower, and she finally stops when she turns her head to look at her friend. ]
Um.. Robby. If you had to choose between dying as a human or living as.. something different, as a being that had to survive by drinking blood.. what would you do..?
[ It's a heavy question, isn't it. Chizuru usually wouldn't ask anyone that, but it's been on her mind for a long while now, without anyone to talk to about it.
And she trusts him with these heavy things. If she can't ask Robby about this hypothetical scenario, who could she ask? ]
[ A man like that would need to disappear. To stop people finding him for payback--and how far do his connections go? Doesn't all this mean he has some connection to the government? But it sounds like he bailed; maybe because of the side-effects were disastrous, and while some would see that as testing, it sounds like maybe the results weren't approved of by the higher ups.
But that question-- he wants to say something about vampires this time, but it's also not appropriate. He does have to pause his picking though, a small sound escaping his lips, since--wow. Heavy question time indeed. But-- ]
Does it matter what blood it is? Is the other person gonna die? [ 'Other person'. Yes, he knows how this goes!! ] It'd be crazy, but--if no one got harmed permanently, I'd want to live.
[ Said, as if he wouldn't want to live anyway. But he doesn't really want to think about a meaner side. Though- ]
Going crazy would be a bigger deal to me. And not going out in the sun. [ Well. ] Not as big a deal as the crazy part, but I'd miss it.
[ He's using a somewhat lighter tone, just to take some weight off an otherwise heavy subject. ]
[ She smiles at him, but there's something undoubtedly sad in it. His words ring surprisingly familiar, after all. She thinks about Heisuke, and the way he had seemed to change after having no choice but to drink it, to turn himself into a fury to survive. The way he'd try to downplay it, joking at her about missing the sun, even though Chizuru knew he was struggling with it far more than that.
She only continues when she looks away, staring at the bushes with the berries in front of them, rather than directly at Robby. ]
No one else has to get hurt. Um, when they can.. contain themselves, anyway. [ Since, you know. Bad things usually happen when someone loses control like that while craving for blood.. Chizuru knows that all too well, especially since one of them even attacked her. ] But.. I always thought it was kind of sad. Finding out I wasn't human was.. hard for me.
[ It's hard to even admit out loud. Even to Robby. ]
So I can imagine making the decision yourself to throw away your humanity would be even harder.
[ Sometimes, maybe. Maybe there's times--like when you're faced with the possibility of becoming something else you've seen be so monstrous, that makes others lose their mind and hurt even the people they knew--that makes it easier to be, when the other option would be a slower, suffering end to the same conclusion. Robby can understand picking it, somewhat, or he can see it.
But: ]
Both are pretty scary. [ That's the thing, isn't it? ] It's not a good trade, and turning into something that needs blood to survive--that's gotta be a lot to grapple with. And people aren't gonna understand.
[ He can imagine it, and that's the way Robby's picturing this. The obstacles, the hardships, internally and externally. ]
But--if you're still you, and you got people who can, [ and here, he pulls his lips into something encouraging, ] --that can make a difference.
I mean, [ he adds after a beat, starting to slowly lean his upper body her way; gives a look left and right, to make sure there's no one around, ] --even if you're a squid, no one can tell you apart from the not-squid people.
[ Judging by the look in Chizuru's eyes when she turns her head to let her gaze meet Robby's, she thinks that both are pretty scary too. Chizuru wouldn't want to die, nor would she want to be changed into something that feels even more twisted than her non-human body already feels like.
It always feels nice to meet Robby like this. On such an equal level. The men of the Shinsengumi were all so impressive-- and it's not like Robby isn't, but he feels a little bit more easily human. He isn't afraid to admit certain things to her.
Or to go out of his way to try and make her smile. She sees what he's doing there at the end, and though Chizuru's smile is tiny and embarrassed, it's still visible for a moment before she ducks her head in shame. ]
I guess we are squid people together now..
[ So maybe that makes the difference between them less weird. Though Chizuru, even as a demon, has thankfully never been quite as strange as a fury, never seeking out blood. ]
.. and if you ever ended up in a strange situation where you really had to drink blood to survive, you could have mine. [ Is that a little weird to say?
Maybe. But maybe Chizuru is saying it exactly because the conversation is a little lighter, so it might not sound as heavy.. Despite the fact that the girl definitely means it. After all, it's not like they haven't exploited the fact that she's got a much bigger supply of blood than most people before for Viktor's blood experiments. ]
[ Robby knows that joke alone can't touch--can't even be called the same as--Chizuru's demon-being issues, but you know, maybe it helps to be reminded that Robby knows, and he doesn't mind (Chizuru is Chizuru--what does being a demon even mean, really?).
But he doesn't need to think about that himself at all, does he, for what Chizuru decides to think about. Which, okay, it's kind of related to the topic of Japanese vampires, but is Robby making a face at the offer of 'oh you can drink my blood any time'?
Yes, he definitely needs a second to process this. ]
Thaa...nks? [ It's not odd-odd, and Robby can at least sound funny about it. Add: ] You can drink my blood too...?
[ This almost makes Robby wonder...
...
Wait, is this really a question he wants to ask jokingly? At all? Except this sudden thought it definitely sticking with him. No, he's gotta know: ]
Did you feed people in the shinsengumi a bunch of your blood?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ Maybe she's had them here, but it's fun to learn about your friends and sound like a clueless American, right. He's got gloves on (a good constant to have in Trench, so picking doesn't bother him. Truthfully, it's less about being food conscious to Robby as this is about having trade options in the future. And when he's got a bunch of friends who love to do kitchen shit, it's the perfect way of obscuring some money in the bank, right?
Robby's omen has seemingly finished with his back-dirt rubbing and is now watching the pair. It's a nice day, for once... ]
no subject
.. not that Chizuru is fully sure, mind you. It's not like she's spent a whole lot of time out in nature, but she does remember some trips with her father to gather herbs when she was much younger.. Not to mention that she's never seen fruit like this at any of the marketplaces back home.
So she's at least sure enough to shake her head without feeling like she's lying to him.
The girl still doesn't just grab the fruit from his hands - please, it's Chizuru - but she's staring at it intently all the same, before her gaze flutters up to Robby's face as she asks: ]
What does it taste like..? [ N-Not like she's curious for any special reason..!! H.. H-haha..!!
At least she does know the fruit is safe, since her little birdie Omen is still snoozing away on her shoulder, which he wouldn't be doing if there was actual danger surrounding this mystery berry. ]
no subject
Mostly sweet, sometimes sour? Not in a bad way, [ he adds, and--really, he can't describe it any better, so he motions the berry at her. ] Here, try it. Spit it out if you don't like it.
[ Ladies just do that, right. You can totally suggest a person do that. ]
no subject
It's why she's already determined to fully eat the blackberry the moment she does take it from Robby's hand with a grateful nod, slowly moving it towards her mouth. She absolutely can't spit it out! T-That's gross! And rude!
.. thankfully it's not really a decision she has to make in the first place though. Nothing about the fruit tastes bad once it's in her mouth, and Chizuru swallows it after a moment of thoughtful chewing. ]
It's good. [ A rather simple conclusion, but.. well, it's just true.
No wonder Robby couldn't resist the call. ]
They're small.. [ So you'd need a lot of them to have a full meal, she means, especially as she's turning to look at the ones that are still growing. ] But they'd be good to have around as snacks, right?
no subject
And the results seem to indicate a pass, about as simple as is to be expected. It's as she goes on that Robby livens up, since oh, Chizuru. ]
Sure, but jam? I love blackberry jam. Mom used to buy it sometimes if we saw it. I wanna take these to Snow White and put on my best face to get a few jars made.
[ Robby does gesture to the small crate he's got at his feet, no bigger than a waste bin. Too small, not the right carrier? You have to use what you can find lying around, and Robby does not want to stick berries in a bag. He's already learned his lesson there once...!! ]
You can come with if you wanna learn something new in the kitchen. Hanging out in a kitchen with friends is fun.
[ Wink wink, since Chizuru's taught him a few meals. :) ]
no subject
Even though Chizuru may be a little too busy - mentally busy, that is - to really catch on to that last part. She's too busy thinking about jam, still a relatively new enough concept to her that she needs a moment to think to recall what it even is again, and then thinking about these berries being made.. into jam.. and what that'd taste like..
....
It's all being processed, even if it means that Chizuru may be quiet for a moment longer than necessarily intended as she stares at the berries, almost as if she's mesmerized.
But then she seems to snap herself out of it - enough to shoot Robby a faintly sheepish look before she ducks her head. ]
Well, I guess it's a little embarrassing for me, isn't it.. Being outdone by someone so much younger. [ Snow White is so young, Robby. Chizuru may look young for her age, sure, but she's a grandma in comparison!!
Not that she doesn't genuinely think Snow White is amazing, so of course she could make this mystical berry jam, but it's a little bit hard to not feel embarrassed when you make cooking out of your Main Things and then you can't make something a 14 year old can apparently make...
Welcome to the world of female pride, Robby. The variation that doesn't involve catfighting while kicking each other in the face, anyway. ]
I-- I guess the least I can do is make sure to pick as many of these for you as I can, to make up for not being able to help you turn them into jam..!
no subject
Come with me, [ is his very simple solution to this; a fondness to his voice like humour, baffled, but nevertheless. ] You wanna learn? She's been giving lessons since last year, and--I don't know how to make jam.
[ Look at him, gesturing at himself with both hands!! ]
You're not gonna be the odd one out. You can show her how to make something from your side of the world; she'll love it.
no subject
Though it's a talent she can at least use while multi-tasking, since she's starting to help now to pluck some more of the berries, handing them over to Robby so he can put them with the rest. While listening to him, and while still seeming a touch flustered. Chizuru is a multi-talented girl, obviously. ]
I'll come. [ That's not her problem, at least. Like she's ever going to turn Robby down.
Besides, she'd want to help anyway. ]
But-- um, j-just so you know, it's different when you don't know how to make some food. [ Look at this. Chizuru trying to protest, but in her typical Chizuru-like way - where it sounds like she doesn't want to go too hard with it, out of worry about being rude, but still wants to.. gently try and say what she wants to say anyway..
If not just because it's Robby, and she trusts him enough to be a little more expressive than she may necessarily be around others. ]
You're a boy.
[ Welcome to earlier century gender standards, Robby.. ]
no subject
My mom can make food, either. [ With a smile, and no judgment. Just, that's some insight on where people are in the future, Chizuru. He says this while working to grab berries, plucking a few and then turning to chuck them in. He wishes he had scissors (garden scissors?) to get through to some of the farther up ones, but eh. There's enough mess to get some jars of blackberry, right? ]
Show her that unagi recipe. With the sauce? [ Oh. ] I bet there's ways you pickle and she pickles that're different. She's from...I think Europe. Americans came from Europe to America, so there's more cross over with us.
[ And the fact they're both white, but he's mainly trying to signal the big difference between Japan and wherever Snow White's from. ]
no subject
.. yes, it's odd.. And it's not like Robby was all that good at cooking either when she first started teaching him, right? W-What did they eat..? Would that be rude to ask? It feels like it would be rude to ask.
Chizuru's mind is still churning on that one as she deposits more of the berries, and then starts on something that feels a little safer. ]
There were a few Europeans trading with Japan.. [ Chizuru may not be that great at keeping track of major movements in the country, but she did know this much, especially after her involvement with the Shinsengumi. ] But there wasn't much influence. People don't really like western influence where I come from..
[ It's a Big Thing, Robby. History is wild. ]
My father did study Dutch medicine though. It's why people came to him for things they couldn't see other doctors in Edo for..
[ She glances back at the vegetation in front of them right now. ]
But he never told me about these berries. [ Granted, they're not really medicinal, now are they. ]
no subject
Well, good thing I'm here to tell you now. [ How about that. Nevermind a dad who was seemingly not around for any good reason in the first place, and who Robby doesn't have many good thoughts about (but who also knows to keep that shit to himself!! shitty father solidarity!!). ]
Did you learn about Dutch medicine too like you did the other stuff? [ You know, other stuff. 'Other medicine'. ]
no subject
It's enough of a reply that when she replies out loud, it's only to that next part, first nodding and then: ]
Some of it. But apparently he had also been working on things I never knew about.
[ There's a bit of an awkward tone even to just the way she says it, indicating that said 'things' might not be necessarily good.. ]
He was.. um.. [ Her berry picking momentarily slows down. ] He was experimenting.
[ Ominous. ]
no subject
This have something to do with why he left?
[ And all that shit around that other guy he was apparently involved with? Robby does note Chizuru's slowing, a look taken her way, but he'll keep picking between their conversation. God, what was that name of that one asshole from Chizuru's memory?
...eh. Not worth remembering. ]
no subject
[ She thinks so, but it's not like she's had many opportunities to talk to her father at all since that time he disappeared - and every single piece of information she's gotten since then has only felt like it muddied the waters, including the one time she did get to talk to him.
But whereas that might mean she'd keep all speculation to herself with some people, she feels a little bit more comfortable with Robby. Maybe it's okay to talk about this when he's having trouble with his own dad too, when he might understand that innate instinct to defend them yet try to cope with their bad deeds at the same time. ]
I.. think so though. He was developing a certain kind of medicine in secret. [ Chizuru's hand lingers on a berry for a moment, but then puts it with the rest before she continues to speak. ] It could make people inhumanly strong.
[ Another thing she's not supposed to tell other people about. Not that she couldn't talk all the same with the Shinsengumi and their secrets not present in this place, but-- again, it's Robby. It's not like she's going to keep it from him. ]
no subject
But it doesn't have to be like shimmer, does it, and Robby's trying to be thoughtful. Chizuru's world is sorta like his own, if in the past, but there is something that removes them: demons.
(Or maybe demons really do exist in his own world, and he just doesn't know like millions of others. Fuck, Peter's got a demon in him too, right?) ]
Did medicine like that exist? I mean...stuff that changes you. Makes you stronger, or--faster? Superhuman?
[ Magical, is what Robby wants to say, but it doesn't fit right, and he's frowning, unsure if he's making sense. ]
no subject
It's not good, though, hence why the girl doesn't exactly look enthusiastic about it as she nods. ]
It turns you into a demon. [ Her tone is so serious as she says it, yet lowered a little in volume. It's not even like there's anyone directly around them, but Chizuru seems to not want to say the d-word too loudly in public, not when it could be linked back to her. Sure, most people who heard about it here have been really good about it, but..
Habits die hard. ]
Or.. that was in the intent, anyway. It doesn't fully work like that.. Instead it changes humans into-- um, something inbetween. They call it a fury.
[ Chizuru speaks slowly, trying to divide the information into small little chunks. It never sounded like Robby's world had anything even remotely like this, after all, and the last thing she'd want to do is overwhelm her friend. ]
It means that you're stronger and faster than a normal human, but.. it also changes you into other ways. You can't walk under the sun very well anymore, and you-- you get a craving for blood. [ Yes.
Yes, she is describing vampires, despite not using that name for it. ]
no subject
She sure is describing vampires, there.
Which, maybe there's a variant of vampires in Japan not called that, though the distinctions don't really matter. The symptoms still suck, and Robby wants to ask if people are actually taking it. But if Chizuru knows, then--? ]
The drug got out? [ ...it's really a drug at this point, right? It's not fixing you, like medicine. It's...changing you. Let's go with drug. Also, those berries? Are not currently getting picked because talking about vampires and berries don't mix.
(For now.) ]
no subject
[ She explains it a little slowly, but even though Robby may have stopped with the berry plucking for a moment, Chizuru does continue.
.. in fact there may be something a little extra to her motions, like she's using it to distract herself from focusing too hard on the current topic, since that'd just make her miserable. ]
That was.. the secret of the Shinsengumi. The shogunate ordered them to use it on their own men. Not on everyone, but-- um, on a small group. But it didn't work that well, and the people they used it on were very prone to losing their minds.. [ Her tone is obviously awkward.
Why wouldn't it be, when her father is the person who caused all of that? That knowledge has only made her thoughts about him even more complicated, even aside from all the demon stuff. ]
It's why I was actually staying with the Shinsengumi. I accidentally found out about their secret. I-- I ran into some of those men while they had escaped and were going wild by killing people on the street at night.. Some of the Shinsengumi captains saved me from them, but they couldn't let me go free, since I found out about the secret experiments.
[ And, you know, keeping her captive? Chizuru knows it was the kinder option, considering that killing her off right away sure was discussed. Extensively. Right in front of her.
But Chizuru knows better than to mention that part to Robby on top of it all. ]
no subject
But Robby doesn't eventually resume the berry picking again, since--Robby can tell it's on purpose on Chizuru's end, and he doesn't want to make her feel any more awkward by his stopping, or that she should stop using it as something of a distraction. Though he's slower, no longer thinking about them or the jam. How can his mind be on any of that with everything that Chizuru's telling him now?
Like, shit. How do you deal with any of that? From what you're dad is doing, to the captive situation (that's a sure different scenario from what he was thinking, huh), to the drug... ]
Did they find out your dad was the guy who made the drug? [ Since Chizuru knows--and she didn't seem to know where her dad was to begin with. ] That's gotta give you protection.
[ You don't want to off the drug-maker's daughter. ]
no subject
(Wow, so spot on - almost as if Robby understands the way semi-shady people think a little too well!!) ]
It's what saved me. [ She admits it with a very soft tone. It's not pleasant to think back on, after all. Though her life with the Shinsengumi was good before she showed up here in Trench - very good, even - the first few months sure were really, really rough. ]
I helped them look for my father, since he mysteriously disappeared after giving them those potions. But along the way things got more dire, and..
[ .. her voice trails off. Chizuru's hands grow a little slower, and she finally stops when she turns her head to look at her friend. ]
Um.. Robby. If you had to choose between dying as a human or living as.. something different, as a being that had to survive by drinking blood.. what would you do..?
[ It's a heavy question, isn't it. Chizuru usually wouldn't ask anyone that, but it's been on her mind for a long while now, without anyone to talk to about it.
And she trusts him with these heavy things. If she can't ask Robby about this hypothetical scenario, who could she ask? ]
no subject
But that question-- he wants to say something about vampires this time, but it's also not appropriate. He does have to pause his picking though, a small sound escaping his lips, since--wow. Heavy question time indeed. But-- ]
Does it matter what blood it is? Is the other person gonna die? [ 'Other person'. Yes, he knows how this goes!! ] It'd be crazy, but--if no one got harmed permanently, I'd want to live.
[ Said, as if he wouldn't want to live anyway. But he doesn't really want to think about a meaner side. Though- ]
Going crazy would be a bigger deal to me. And not going out in the sun. [ Well. ] Not as big a deal as the crazy part, but I'd miss it.
[ He's using a somewhat lighter tone, just to take some weight off an otherwise heavy subject. ]
no subject
[ She smiles at him, but there's something undoubtedly sad in it. His words ring surprisingly familiar, after all. She thinks about Heisuke, and the way he had seemed to change after having no choice but to drink it, to turn himself into a fury to survive. The way he'd try to downplay it, joking at her about missing the sun, even though Chizuru knew he was struggling with it far more than that.
She only continues when she looks away, staring at the bushes with the berries in front of them, rather than directly at Robby. ]
No one else has to get hurt. Um, when they can.. contain themselves, anyway. [ Since, you know. Bad things usually happen when someone loses control like that while craving for blood.. Chizuru knows that all too well, especially since one of them even attacked her. ] But.. I always thought it was kind of sad. Finding out I wasn't human was.. hard for me.
[ It's hard to even admit out loud. Even to Robby. ]
So I can imagine making the decision yourself to throw away your humanity would be even harder.
no subject
[ Sometimes, maybe. Maybe there's times--like when you're faced with the possibility of becoming something else you've seen be so monstrous, that makes others lose their mind and hurt even the people they knew--that makes it easier to be, when the other option would be a slower, suffering end to the same conclusion. Robby can understand picking it, somewhat, or he can see it.
But: ]
Both are pretty scary. [ That's the thing, isn't it? ] It's not a good trade, and turning into something that needs blood to survive--that's gotta be a lot to grapple with. And people aren't gonna understand.
[ He can imagine it, and that's the way Robby's picturing this. The obstacles, the hardships, internally and externally. ]
But--if you're still you, and you got people who can, [ and here, he pulls his lips into something encouraging, ] --that can make a difference.
I mean, [ he adds after a beat, starting to slowly lean his upper body her way; gives a look left and right, to make sure there's no one around, ] --even if you're a squid, no one can tell you apart from the not-squid people.
[ :) ]
no subject
It always feels nice to meet Robby like this. On such an equal level. The men of the Shinsengumi were all so impressive-- and it's not like Robby isn't, but he feels a little bit more easily human. He isn't afraid to admit certain things to her.
Or to go out of his way to try and make her smile. She sees what he's doing there at the end, and though Chizuru's smile is tiny and embarrassed, it's still visible for a moment before she ducks her head in shame. ]
I guess we are squid people together now..
[ So maybe that makes the difference between them less weird. Though Chizuru, even as a demon, has thankfully never been quite as strange as a fury, never seeking out blood. ]
.. and if you ever ended up in a strange situation where you really had to drink blood to survive, you could have mine. [ Is that a little weird to say?
Maybe. But maybe Chizuru is saying it exactly because the conversation is a little lighter, so it might not sound as heavy.. Despite the fact that the girl definitely means it. After all, it's not like they haven't exploited the fact that she's got a much bigger supply of blood than most people before for Viktor's blood experiments. ]
no subject
But he doesn't need to think about that himself at all, does he, for what Chizuru decides to think about. Which, okay, it's kind of related to the topic of Japanese vampires, but is Robby making a face at the offer of 'oh you can drink my blood any time'?
Yes, he definitely needs a second to process this. ]
Thaa...nks? [ It's not odd-odd, and Robby can at least sound funny about it. Add: ] You can drink my blood too...?
[ This almost makes Robby wonder...
...
Wait, is this really a question he wants to ask jokingly? At all? Except this sudden thought it definitely sticking with him. No, he's gotta know: ]
Did you feed people in the shinsengumi a bunch of your blood?
[ Didn't she say a bunch of them got turned!? ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
wrap??